3 SIDES TO A TRIANGLE? SURE...BUT 3 ANGLES TOO!



SIDE 1

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School presented far more challenges than I had anticipated! There where "triggers" that I had not factored into our early developmental learning stage and thus had no strategy to counter. Things like transitioning him into a larger, noisier, faster-paced environment. One with more students than daycare and less teachers, which meant less one-on-one. It was sensory overload, and my son struggled to balance it all. He was still very limited with auditory input and output, so there were challenges in following the routines of lunch, recess, bathroom breaks, daily instructions, etc. He struggled with social adaptation and school drills which resulted in the development of new more complicated "traits". He was also failing to make a connection with his work assignments, and focusing became an issue.

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ANGLE 1

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I became my son's "security blanket" a reminder that he was safe and that he could do this! To help him transition to class I walked him to his homeroom class every morning and used that time for "pep talks" and to organize his daily agenda. I became a volunteer parent at his school (you'd be surprised by the things you see and learn "behind the scenes); We synchronized time with event and even conducted "unscheduled" fire drills, tornado drills, and alarms! I got creative with work assignments using play-doh; paints/brushes/canvas; became a "one mom show" by acting out some of the assignments...including dressing for the part!

 

SIDE 2

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The biggest surprise for me, and this is not a reflection on all educators and administrators...I mean no disrespect, but merely to be honest about my experience early-on, but the biggest surprise were the challenges I encountered from my son's school administration and some teachers! I endured opposition, deception, betrayal, and retaliation! IEP requirements (co-teach; small group; one-on-one, etc.) were not being provided, in fact they were being changed. Teaching methods agreed on were not being used, and behavioral concerns weren't reported (crying spells; outburst to sounds in classroom and alarms/drills. and the unauthorized use of a weight jacket). I had a teacher accuse him of biting and scratching her to validate their attempt to transfer him to a school for students with non-functioning capabilities (it was later proven that these incidents never happened and I had him transferred out of her class). I had to conduct meetings with school board members, the administration, and outside counsel. I had to contact the State Board of Education and Washington D.C. Dept. of Education. I was branded with a  reputation of "no non-sense" and "non flexible" when it came to accountability, and got banned from entering the school (though I was able to get that decision overturned). I had to wear several hats during his elementary years, but we got through it all!

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ANGLE 2

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I became my son's "advocate"! I stopped taking for granted things I was being told and started paying more attention to what my son "showed" me. When he demonstrated at home that he didn't understand his homework assignments, I began to question how it was being taught to him at school. I questioned if the plan outlined in his IEP was being followed, which lead to me "dissecting" past and present IEP goal achievements and compared them to what he could demonstrate at home. When the achievements failed to add-up, I began requesting documents to show how those achievements where being measured. I stepped-up our communication exercises, and requested parent-teacher conferences when he began to communicate (in fragments) a "situation" that happened in class. Which is how I discovered (not advised by the school) that my son had been the target of severe bullying, and after failing to implement the regulations bound by State Law, I had to physically remove him from school until they provided a safe Free Appropriate Public Education. Despite being forced to be home, we turned in every work assignment given to the students who could safely attend school!

 

SIDE 3

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Middle school however was a FANTASTIC experience! We still faced the challenges of his autistic spectrum and added to them newly developed sensory-outburst and so forth as a result of elementary school problems, but the teacher's and the administrator's were the change makers! They were rolling out a new program for kids on the autistic spectrum and the classrooms were small and structured. Teachers listened and implemented suggested strategies and worked with me with assignments and kept me updated on changes and concerns. Not only did my son actually meet goals set in his IEP, but he met academic requirements and did extremely well on testing expectations. He had an exceptional Speech instructor who's lessons prepared my son for experiences beyond school. Collectively, every person that came in contact with my son during his middle school years played a huge role in preparing him for high school, which is where we are today!

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ANGLE 3

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I learned how to trust again!! What I wanted for my son academically...this school wanted for him. The administration and teacher's wanted to heal the scars we were left with from the previous events, and show us that they could/would deliver on things we discussed in private. THEY DID NOT FAIL! THE ONLY ANGLE NEEDED...WAS ONE OF TRUST!

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R.S.V.P...

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Resilience!

Sacrifice!

Vigilance!

Perseverance!